Sex Tip Tuesday: Work on yourself

Chillin in the jacuzzi

Sex Tip Tuesday! I’m going to try to make this a consistent thing so it’s something you look forward to. So please, hold me accountable and ask me for my tits, I mean TIPS if you don’t see it on Tuesday.

Tip: If you’re looking to have better sex , start with working on yourself.

Having good sex doesn’t start with blaming anyone in your life. I don’t care if it’s because your partner’s head game sucks, they’re wearing the wrong sized condom, they can’t last in bed. Blaming them for those things won’t help you have better sex with them.

It actually starts with yourself and being honest with yourself. It’s easier to blame someone for our sufferings instead of confronting them. The next time you’re going through something and it’s interfering with your sex life, really dive into why you’re feeling like that.

What does being honest with yourself look like?

– Admitting to yourself you’re insecure about something.

When we’re insecure, it’s easy for us to project it on to our partners which causes us to become bitter. How can you identify this insecurity and over come it?

– Admitting to yourself that you have never had an orgasm and you don’t know what that feels like.

It’s completely normal for a woman to feel like they’ve never orgasmed. About 4 out of 10 Americans say they’ve never had an orgasm. This has to do with so many factors from sexual history, lack of knowledge about the body, your day, medications, etc. So admitting this to yourself and to your partner will help you create a space that will open it to learning and discovering what feels good for you together. Dj Envy’s wife admitted to him that she was faking her orgasms for 10 years! I’m happy to say she is cumming now.

– What does love look like? What does it feel like?

Sometimes being in a relationship, we feel we know what love is but we still feel like something is off. Dive into why you feel like that. Defining your values in a relationship will help you come up with the answers.

– Admitting you’re afraid of the response if you speak up and say something.

Being honest with yourself by telling yourself that you’re afraid of speaking up is the first step. Why are you afraid? Tell yourself, if your partner doesn’t respond with respect and empathy then maybe he’s not the one for you. Could that be the reason why you’re not having the best sex?

– Telling yourself a position doesn’t feel good and then telling your partner.

When you’re honest with yourself, you can start to identify what feels good to you and what doesn’t. Once you can identify that, you can say something. It doesn’t have to ruin the mood. Remember you can always ask what you want in bed in a sexy way.

As you can see, being honest with yourself will help you identify why you’re really suffering. It’s not easy being vulnerable but it’s worth it. Knowing yourself is key to great sex and even a great life. If you know yourself it’s hard for anyone to break you.

“Stand for something or die in the morning”- Kendrick Lamar.

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Stay Sexy & Curious

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