Tell Your Partner What you Want Sexually

Happy Monday!! Sorry, I’ve been slacking with my posts! A lot has been happening and I was away this past weekend at New Orleans celebrating my 2 year anniversary with my Boo. But, I’m back with a sex post that I promise you will change your sex life forever!

Continuing Spice Up Your Sex Life Challenge for this month, I have “Tell Your Partner What You Want Sexually” on the calendar.  In other words, don’t wait for him to tell you what he wants from you in bed, YOU tell him what you want from him! This will prevent a lot of running back to your girlfriends and gossiping about what you didn’t get in bed.

I think the reason why so many people believe men love sex more than women is because men are more vocal about sex and what they want in the bedroom. We can learn something from them because this seems to work for them not only in the bedroom but in the professional world. Hewlett Packard did a study on why women weren’t in top management and Forbes put it like this, “Men are confident about their ability at 60%, but women don’t feel confident until they’ve checked off each item on the list.”

When it comes to sex, we women check the box for everything on the list. I don’t know what that list looks like but I know that we check it all! I know this because I’ve seen what men will do for us and there is no way we can go wrong! The only times things go wrong is when we don’t ask for what we want to feel fulfilled.

Actually, what men don’t tell you is that they love it when a woman knows what they want in bed. You’d be surprised by how many men actually just want to sit down and not think about the next move. From experience, men are turned on by me because I know specifically what turns me on, what positions make me look good, and most importantly, what makes me feel good. Best believe if I want my booty spanked I will grab his hand and show him how I want to be spanked.

TRY THIS: Think about all the times you had sex with someone and then afterwards felt like something was missing. Sit down with yourself and list the things you wish would’ve happened for the moment to be more satisfying for you. Do you wish that he went down on you longer? Do you wish that he was more gentle with your clit? Do you wish that you didn’t feel rushed sucking his dick? Do you wish foreplay was longer? Do you wish he wouldn’t call you a bitch during sex? Do you wish that he could’ve pulled your hair a little harder?

Think about your perfect sex session and how that looks like. Of course, keep in mind that you can’t control the situation completely but you are able to do things for yourself that will make you feel more empowered and less shameful. 

If you’re intimidated by this, you can always start slow by saying “no” or speaking up when you feel uncomfortable. You’ll eventually get used to being more vocal in which you’ll begin to see your sex life change for the better!

I hope this advice helps and you give it a try! Remember, you can always go back to being submissive and not ask for what you want if you don’t like it.

The Spice up Your Sex Life challenge is supposed to challenge your way of thinking about what you already believe in. It’s to show you what could happen if you step out of your comfort zone. Make sure to leave a comment if you’re participating in this challenge. Again, you don’t need to follow the challenge everyday. If anything, treat it like BINGO and see how many you can do this month! That’s what I’m doing! HAVE FUN!!

Stay Sexy & Curious!